Introduction: Do You Rely on Others a Little Too Much?
Let’s be real and honest here. Do you catch yourself constantly asking others what to do, or what they think, or even what they think you should do in certain situations? Whether it’s about your career, your relationships, or even where to go or what to order at a restaurant, leaning too heavily on other people’s opinions can not only hold you back, but ask yourself whose life are you living by doing so! And Yes, advice is great, but what happens when you rely only on that and stop listening to yourself?
In this blog, we’ll chat about why trusting yourself is so important, the downsides of always seeking advice, and some practical tips to help you hear (and trust!) your inner voice (not the critical one that always points out your mistakes – that’s a different inner voice) I am talking about your Soul urges/nudges and quiet whispers (if you truly listen). Wherever you are—Brisbane, the Sunshine Coast, the Gold Coast, or anywhere else—learning to trust yourself can transform your life. Ready? Let’s dive in!
Why Is Over-Reliance on Others Harmful?
Firstly let’s point out that it’s natural to seek input. But to constantly rely on others can:
- Knock Your Confidence: You might start second guessing yourself, doubting your ability to make decisions; feel fearful that you are going to make a big mistake etc
- Create a Crutch: Always looking for external validation means you’re not building your decision-making muscles. You are not learning from your mistakes – which incidentally is why we make them. There is never any failure – only feedback!
- Cause Stress: Worrying about pleasing everyone or picking the “right” choice can leave you feeling stuck, anxious and becoming a champion procrastinator!
- Dilute Your Authenticity: Trying to meet others’ expectations can pull you away from what truly matters to you.
If this sounds familiar, stop worrying—we’ve all been there and the good news is how easily you can absolutely change it!
Advice: The Good, the Bad, and the Overwhelming
Seeking advice isn’t all bad—it’s about balance. Let’s break it down:
The Good:
- You get fresh ideas and perspectives.
- Guidance from a life coach or mentor can help you grow and achieve your goals.
- Can make you see things in a different light which may help with your decision making
- The validation may confirm what you already knew and felt.
The Not-So-Good:
- Relying too much on advice can make you second-guess yourself.
- Hearing too many opinions can leave you more confused than when you started.
- You may wonder if you made the decision because you wanted to or because of the person giving the advice.
- You cannot grow your confidence this way because you are not trusting your own thinking and processes.
So, while it’s okay to ask for advice, remember—your opinion matters too.
How to Start Trusting Yourself
If you’re ready to stop second-guessing, doubting yourself and start owning your choices, here are some simple tips to help:
1. Define Your Values: What’s truly important to you? Why? When you know your priorities, decisions become easier.
2. Be Kind to Yourself: Nobody gets it right 100% of the time. Embrace your flaws and focus on progress, rather than perfection.
3. Set Boundaries: It’s okay to say No. Your decisions do not have to please everyone—they just have to work for you. Remember when you are saying Yes to someone or something else – make sure you are not saying No to yourself.
4. Trust Your Gut: You know that little voice inside? The one from your Soul not your Ego! It’s there for a reason. Start listening to it.
5. Flip the Script: Reframe: Instead of asking, “What if I fail?” ask, “What if this works out beautifully?” Remember there is no failure – ONLY FEEDBACK
6. Take Baby Steps: Build self-trust one decision at a time. Start small—and I promise you’ll get there.
Let’s Put This into Perspective
Imagine this: You’re planning a trip. Your friends have lots of ideas about where you should go—some say the mountains, others say the beach. But deep down, you’ve always wanted to visit a tropical island. What do you do?
If you’re constantly seeking approval, you might ignore your dream trip and go along with someone else’s suggestion. But what if you trusted yourself? You’d book that island getaway, and guess what? You’d probably have the time of your life because it’s what you truly wanted.
See the difference? Trusting yourself isn’t about ignoring others—it’s about having and prioritizing your voice.
Take the Next Step Toward Self-Trust
Learning to trust yourself, like everything we are learning, is a journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. By challenging self doubt, building self-reliance and practicing the tips above, you’ll discover a side of you that has been there all the time, just waiting for you to set it free. In doing so you will gain the confidence to make real, honest and authentic decisions that feel right for YOU. – and that I can promise is a wonderful thing.
If you’re ready to go deeper but do not know how or where to start, I’m here to help! Check out my life coaching sessions available in Brisbane, the Sunshine Coast, the Gold Coast, and worldwide.
Not ready for personal coaching – You could explore my hypnosis and meditation audio programs and abundance worksheets to support your journey.
Not into that either – then I have a further option 🙂 My book Making Broken Beautiful is packed with tools, strategies and techniques that I used to conquer my self doubt and crush that nasty inner critic who made my life miserable. Available on amazon.
Amazon Link: https://bit.ly/3yNMa94MakingBrokenBeautiful
Visit pamelamillican.com today and take the first step toward trusting your inner voice. You’ve got this!